Let go, open up, discover new paths in college

"Everything our parents told us was good is bad: sun, milk, red meat, college."
- Woody Allen, "Annie Hall," 1977

While we're all aware of premature aging and high cholesterol, even comic genius Allen missed the boat on the popular conception of college. It's a truly unique experience, no matter if you're on the "four-years-is-all-I-can-stand-please-get-me-the-hell-out-of-here-ASAP" plan or you intend to milk higher education for all it's worth. For most students, college is their first chance to determine a schedule of work and play, set their own curfews, and examine the possibility of subsisting entirely on beer and Skittles - a time for drafting their own declaration of independence.

Erin Marsh Marsh Madness

In the process, you may well discover that a good number of the things your parents told you were good are bad; political ideologies, religious beliefs, ideas of a "worthwhile" degree, and perspectives on sex, feature films and the job market are all likely to waver from the gospel according to Mom and Dad.

Going home again will probably not be the same. Lots of people and places you found delightful and amusing are no longer so delightful and amusing. You might face some flack from the home team for the ways in which you've evolved, but remember: The growing you experience gradually is a sudden shock to the crowd that's missed the transition. It doesn't have to be a problem. Changes are often accompanied by some degree of stress or anxiety - and at times this anxiety is a powerful force - but part of emerging from the University an intellectually mature person requires some challenging. Your University experience may include heavy-duty examination of yourself, your parents, your plans and your dreams. That's OK. That's the way it should be.

A lot of it is about letting go.

No one is exempt from this. Somewhere right now, First Daughter Chelsea is packing up her posters, giving a last look around her White House bedroom, and kissing Bill, Hillary and Socks goodbye. Chelsea's already made strides: She bucked Yale (the perennial favorite of presidential offspring) to soak up some rays at Stanford. Consider yourselves lucky - you don't face the daunting task of defying a dad who leads the free world. But Chelsea - like the rest of us - will inevitably choose different paths and take on new perspectives when she leaves home.

"I refuse to live in a place where the only cultural advantage is that you can turn right on a red light." - W. Allen

Part of the challenge and discovery will happen as a result of mingling your views with those of others. These late-night, informal, occasionally intoxicating (or intoxicated) debates can run the gamut from serious to seriously hilarious; some can inspire great conversation and insight, while others, um, won't.

Predictions: You will insist it's "soda" or insist it's "pop." You will engage in the East Coast vs. Midwest discussion maddeningly frequently, and eventually realize that - guess what! - everybody comes from somewhere and somewhere is not all the same place. Wielding a large polo mallet in such discussions will get you nowhere, nor will pledging inferiority or superiority win points. Give others the same freedom of opinion for which you strive. Enjoy your differences. Save the insult-swapping for issues of importance, like the Michigan-Ohio State football game.

Moreover, the variety of people you encounter will open doors and open your eyes. Do a lot of listening, and observe carefully - the subtleties of human interaction will probably teach you more about life than anything you'll record in a blue book. The most startling, amazing and important lessons I learned at the University will not be inscribed on my diploma.

Most of all, use this time to assess the roads that have brought you here and decide if you like the map or want to draw a new one. It's your time and your ticket. Make it a good trip.

- Erin Marsh is the Daily Editorial Page editor. She can be reached over e-mail at eemarsh@umich.edu.

09-03-97