Daily Arts Writer

I have a confession to make: I didn't listen to this album, and with any luck, I'll die without ever having to.

Which isn't to say that is devoid of merit. Far from it. In fact, I'm willing to wager that Fozzy is the comedy record of the year, ample proof of which can be found in the accompanying CD booklet. The cover shot establishes that Fozzy is a band of legendary proportions - physical proportions, I mean. Singer Moongoose McQueen is clearly the Ivan Drago of frontmen, a tough guy who honed his craft in a foreign country while bassist Shawn "Sports" Pop is the road-warrior, an on-stage anchor, a team player guy who could be the gang's bodyguard if he had to, not unlike Bubba Smith in the "Police Academy" films.

The liner notes, written by a magazine editor named "Shoji Mochizuki," tell the tale of Fozzy's bittersweet success: Having found that the only way to escape a raw record deal was to leave the States, the group spent 20 years in Japan, where they wowed audiences, made timeless records and became "like Emperors." After catching wind that every pop-metal superstar from Ozzy to Skid Row had ripped off their material, Fozzy returned stateside and now hopes to claim their rightful position as the kings of Sports Metal.

Not bad, guys, but I have a feeling that this record will have folks wondering on what day did some record company ad wizard come up with Fozzy, and couldn't he have rested on that day, too?

Grade: N/A